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Archive for the ‘Blunt Talk’ Category

Holding Back

Knowing yourself deeply is both a blessing and a curse.

I allow myself to read as much as I can and because of this I live much of life between pages, but this is the only indulgence I can allow.

If I were to allow myself to drink or do drugs, I’d be an addict. If I were to allow myself to take down the walls of my sadistic side, I’d scare myself and my partner. If I allowed myself to indulge my emotions, I’d laugh like a wild person and I’d cry until I dried up. If I loved to the fullest extent of my heart it would smother the ones I adore. If I spoke without sensor my thoughts would shock both liberal and conservative, judgemental and accepting.

I often feel like I’m an addict without an addiction, but only because I don’t relax. I keep a tight control wherever I’m able.

There’s a strong urge and desire to overindulge in life; to bite into existence until I draw blood. It overflows in a way I can’t explain and in moments I think the dam may burst I jump into a book; into a different existence, until I’m in control again. I do this for myself and for others.

I have always overwhelmed people. I’ve been labeled as “too much” and “too (insert adjective)” most of my life.

Truly; they have no idea.

What you see is a pond. What you don’t see is the width and depth of an ocean.

Be glad I hold back the tidal wave. Be glad I don’t relax and “just be.” The tsunami of me would leave you shocked, blinded, beaten, and breathless.

Watch “Secret Surprises and Suspense with Elle and Caitlyn” on YouTube

I’m a BIG fan of these two authors, but beyond their books they are just hilarious! Their segment on YouTube is called Blunt Talk. You’ll understand why!
Two friends and romance authors being totally real. It’s awesome!
F-words and giveaways fly almost as fast as the wine and Rediwhip. And you’ll never find an episode without a giggle from Caitlyn O’Leary and “Bless her heart” from Elle Boon. You have to take a few minutes and show them some love! Like and comment on their video. Follow them on Facebook and Twitter. They never disappoint!

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